Preparing for Take Off

Thursday is Chemo day.  I know I said I was scared last time I wrote - but I am so thankful that my fears are being put to rest as I prepare mentally, physically and emotionally for this next step:  “If ye are prepared ye shall not fear”.  Being able to connect with great, inspiring people, realizing how beneficial this next step is going to be long term and just having time pass to get used to the idea, have all helped me “walk through the fear”. 

Today I spoke with a beautiful woman who knows me only peripherally through my sister in law.  I was touched when she told me that there are 350 people who don’t even know me - in her home country of Venezuela praying for me – WOW!  Many of you have mentioned that you and your families are praying for me as well.  I know that this is all a big part of why I am feeling much more at peace with things.  While there have been bumps in the road, I have been able to move through the challenges quickly and there is simply no other explanation than the hand of God in blessing me with this feeling of peace.  This process has taught me that the depth of human compassion is much greater than the suffering that I have or will experience.  I have come to understand on a more personal level how alone the Savior must have felt during His suffering and yet how much strength and compassion He received by going through what He did, so that He could understand and truly “succor his people according to their infirmities” (Alma 7:12).

Chemotherapy is designed to kill fast-growing cancer cells and in the process it also affects other fast growing cells that line your mouth, intestines, bone marrow and hair . . . yes, I will lose my hair. There are several types of Chemo and based on the various features of the type of cancer you have, the oncologist decides what kind of chemo you get.  Mine will be 8 treatments: 4 rounds of Adriamycin + Cytoxan and then 4 rounds of Taxol.  Each treatment is generally 2 weeks apart unless something happens that delays a treatment such as the white/red cells or platelets not being at the right level – in which case a treatment could be delayed.  

I will have my treatments on Thursday's in the infusion room at Huntsman – so if you’re in the area, feel free to stop by the 2^nd floor and chat :). It's an all-day affair that starts in the morning with blood tests and a meeting with the Dr.  and then when I am cleared to start they will mix my Chemo and  attach the IV through a port in my chest that will drip the fluid from a bag - this process takes about 3 hours.  I can sleep, eat, use technology or chat while the infusion is going on.  One tip I have heard from several people is to suck on ice and other cold things the whole time to avoid mouth sores. The next day I will go back in for a shot called Neulasta, which boosts the immune system and builds bone marrow – thus counteracting some of the negative effects of the Chemo drugs. 

Side effects: dry mouth, mouth sores, bone pain (from Neulasta), skin/tooth sensitivity, nausea and fatigue to name a few.  The first 4-5 days after the infusion are supposed to be the worst.  But I am hopeful, optimistic and even have a pipe dream that my hair won't fall out :).  I have stocked my cupboards with Orajel, extra soft toothbrushes, soda and comfort foods. I am ready for the battle, prepared to fight to the end with my family and friends cheering me on.  Thank you for being part of it all - your presence and faith make it bearable.