It is Done!! My Battle with Cancer is Complete!

It is done! Yes, it is true - Friday was my 8th and final Chemo treatment!  I am really finished and victorious over my battle with cancer!!!  It seems almost unbelievable now that it is really here.


Friends came to celebrate, the staff at Huntsman sang to me and gave me my "graduation" certificate and I made up a song: "no more needles, no more hooks, no more nurses dirty looks" (joking of course).

My sweet aunt, who has battled MS and many other challenges in her life made the most amazing display of congatulations I could ever imagine.

My hair is coming back more each day (mostly blonde with some dark brown streaks). I am having a contest with my 6 month old niece - she is winning but not for long :).



I woke up Saturday morning thinking: "I am so excited to live the rest of my life".  Even though I am tired and lethargic from chemo, I know that there are many happy days ahead and that I have a lot to live for. 

So what am I going to do now?  Hmm - well I did spend last week in the happiest place on earth, so how can you top that?  My awesome date pushed me around in a wheelchair, so we all got to go to the front of the line.  My huge family all said thanks for the perk - I told them it better not happen again :). 

As hard as it has been there, truly have been many great memories along the road. I have come to know of many people in my life who are true friends.  I know I can never repay all that I have blessed with along the way.

With all of this excitement, I would like to say that I am feeling great but today has been a little more challenging. While I know that I have arrived at the top of the mountain, there is still another for me to climb that feels overwhelming right now.  I am laying here recovering from my last chemo treatment on Friday and although I do have less pain, I feel a complete lack of energy and motivation.  I am tired of being tired :) and the emotions they warned me about when I was at Huntsman are ensuing.  

It surprised me to hear that many people actually feel depressed after they finish chemo because often the support system goes away, under the assumption that now they are fine. But as a friend pointed out tonight, I have climbed the mountain and to go back down the mountain will require different muscles that are painful in their own unique way :).  It will take several months for my full energy to come back and I have a lot of work to do in order to feel whole again.  Over the past 6 months my body has been through so much and I am really looking forward to getting back to real life and figuring out what my new "normal" is. 

Tonight I am grateful for the reminder from a recent talk that I am not alone:


"You are known and remembered by the most majestic, powerful, and glorious Being in the universe! You are loved by the King of infinite space and everlasting time!  He who created and knows the stars knows you and your name—you are the daughters of His kingdom .  . ."

"God loves you because you are His child. He loves you even though at times you may feel lonely or make mistakes. The love of God and the power of the restored gospel are redemptive and saving. If you will only allow His divine love into your life, it can dress any wound, heal any hurt, and soften any sorrow." - Dieter F. Uchtdorf